IN FOCUS
Midlife – a time to uncovering the truly individual aspects within ourselves
Maria Tibblin
Middle age is frequently misunderstood, often loosely defined as the uncertain interval between youth and old age. Yet, representations of this life stage have existed for centuries, appearing as early as the sixteenth century in artworks that sought to portray the arc of human existence, from cradle to grave.
In modern terms, midlife is generally understood to span the ages of 45 to 65. However, this phase is not merely a matter of biological progression, it carries profound psychological and existential significance.
This chapter of life is marked by a subtle yet persistent realisation, though challenges continue to present themselves, we now face them with the advantage of lived experience. Yet many of these earlier trials may have been endured without reflection, without truly contemplating their deeper meaning or the imprint they left upon our inner world.
It is in this season that a quiet, insistent voice may begin to emerge, asking:
Why does something feel missing, even after all I have achieved in both my personal and professional life?
To entertain such a question is not a small task. It requires honesty and the willingness to engage in a searching dialogue with ourselves. Often, we find that the outward structure of our lives does not entirely mirror the quiet truths we harbour within.
During midlife, these inner truths, might be long overlooked, begin to surface with increasing urgency, revealing tensions that may have been quietly lingering beneath the surface.
In my practice, I often see this process taking shape in clients going through midlife. It is a very common experience: many people begin to feel a quiet restlessness, a gentle pull from within, drawing them toward something they cannot quite name, but which feels deeply important.
Often, there is a feeling of being called, not by outside pressures, but by something deep inside. It may be a part of themselves they’ve ignored or forgotten, now asking to be seen and heard.
And I speak not only as a professional, but as someone who has been through this journey myself. I, too, have faced those deep questions and felt the strong desire to live a more honest and meaningful life. At times, it can feel confusing or even uncomfortable, but it also offers a chance for real growth, fresh understanding, and a greater sense of freedom.
It is, without doubt, a lifelong journey—one that requires courage, patience, and an openness to change. Yet, despite its challenges, it can be deeply rewarding and genuinely freeing.
Midlife, in this sense, is less a period of decline than an opportunity to attend to the soul’s quiet invitation. It is the moment to begin the earnest work of refining oneself into the individual one was always meant to be.
To discover the truly individual aspects of one’s nature requires profound self-examination.
By midlife, parts of ourselves that we may have pushed aside or ignored often begin to rise to the surface, offering a chance of genuine growth and psychological integration.
This is not only a time for reflection, but also for rethinking our priorities—aligning our lives more closely with what truly matters to us.
This can be an uncomfortable process. To look frankly at oneself means confronting where one may have compromised or fallen short of one's own unspoken ideals. And yet, while this form of inner work may prove challenging, it is also profoundly liberating.
It opens the way to living a life that feels more real, more meaningful, and more in tune with our true selves.
Again I like to quote Carl Jung, "The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you really are"
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